Student Stress

Here are my student stressor highlights of the week (so far):

• Email from Stu Dent on Monday

Statgirl--

I am attaching my rough draft and although I am still working on the paper and making changes I would like some feedback. I did notice that the rough draft was due yesterday but I'm looking forward to your comments to help me now.

Stu Dent

Most interesting thing about this email is that this student is so @#$$% clueless that he/she can't even read the syllabus and notice that the rough draft was due over a week ago.

My response: none

• Email from Tuesday

Dear Dr. Statgirl-

I am very much interested in enrolling in your XXXX class this summer. I have a few questions: 1) When does the class start? 2) When and where does the class meet? 3) When does the class end? 4) Can I do part of this class independently?

I should tell you that I will not be able to attend class at all until the end of June due to work conflicts.

Looking forward to your XXX class,

Dr. Future Stu Dent

Is this Stu Dent for real? " I'm completely clueless, apparently already have a PhD and can't use the internet AND , by the way, I would like to enroll in a class in which I will miss at least half of the class sessions"

My response:

Stu Dent,

All course information is on the university website. If you cannot attend class until the end of June , you should not enroll in a summer school course.

--Statgirl

• After exam in class today:

I get back to my office and notice that there is an error on my exam. I asked a question which was impossible to answer from the materials provided. NO ONE asked about this question during the exam...... oh geez, this is not a good sign about their comprehension of the material.

And I really want to be a professor and I'm so excited about my new tenure-track job. (Repeat 3 times.)

Acid Free Paper and Taxes

On my way to the post office today to mail my taxes (yes, I am a procrastinator --that is the first step of my 12 step program), I stopped at the bookstore to get acid free paper. I got the last box but it only has 250 sheets. I need to print 2 copies of my 200 page dissertation. I asked them when the next order would be in. However, the bookstore powers don't see the need to reorder anytime soon--"after all, it is the end of the semester".
When do they think we theses/dissertation writers will print our archival copies that are due on the last Friday in May???
I finally ended up at the 'help desk' defending my need for more acid free paper before July. Possibly convinced them to order, but I was not hopeful. However, as I was checking out....a guy walked in, saw my purchase and asked me where the paper was located---I sent him to the help desk to tell them that they need to reorder!

Easter Slug

The Easter Slug paid me a visit today. I am completely unable to get off of my couch; it was a major effort to move from my bed to the couch--however, the lure of multiple cable channels finally pulled me free of the pillows.

5:30 pm seems like a reasonable time to take a shower and get out of my PJ's finally, doesn't it?

On checking email...

Why do I check my work email account before I go to bed?

I am pretty certain that I did not see that email from a student sending a rough draft 3 days late. It is very clear on the syllabus that it was due on Tuesday and that should the student not have the draft to me by Tuesday, then the final copy would be the only copy I would read. I think email makes submitting things late way too simple--would the student have bothered to make a trek to campus to submit the draft to my mailbox in hopes that I would forget about the passed deadline? I think not.

Sleeping and Dreaming

So now that I am not so focused on cranking out written pages, I have returned to regular sleeping and dreaming patterns. I am very happy that I was able to sleep in until 9 am today. However, the dreams have been a bit "over the edge"--random people in odd places showing up saying obsure things. I'm really hoping that that bizarro land dreams stop soon.

Random Bullets of Crap: Life Update Edition

Since my blogging has been severely limited in recent weeks due to placing every last word I could squeeze out of my tiny little brain onto paper in required chapters, articles, presentations, etc.; it is now time for a real blogging routine to resume.

However, in order to undertake this task, a 'bullets of random crap post' is in order to get things rolling again. . .

• Dissertation is back from the format check---only 4 tiny things to fix in the reference section. Yea! It was well worth paying someone to deal with all that triple space, double indent crap.
• Hotel rooms are booked for visiting family for graduation weekend
• Defense presentation is in pretty good shape-practice run through soon to polish
• Article is back with the editor (anticipating small changes only next go around [fingers and toes crossed])
• Party list is made, appointment made with manager to detail food, beverage, money issues (will print invitations this weekend)
• Still waiting for graduation announcements to arrive--not high on my list, but sure makes the family happy to get one of those double enveloped things.
• Personal life is a 0 ...... whoa, wait! I now have time to have a personal life again--must let my friends know that I am alive.
• Plan to go to coffee/dinner/drink/something with boy from past --why do I do this to myself? I am over him....at least I always think so until I see him again. I'm thinking I should wait until after the defense to schedule this outing.
• On the homefront--serious cleaning is in order.
• Need to go to the grocery store--how is it possible that a girl that loves to eat as much as me can harbor such deep hatred for the grocery store trip.
• Still have a stack of my students' rough drafts to read....hhhmmm? Did I mention that I needed to clean?

Home Sweet Home

Back home from the conference. Weather here is a good 25 degrees warmer than conference city (which is unusual)--pulled out the flip flops today for my first day back in the office. Conference was good--I didn't fall down (yes, that has happened to me before) or say anything too stupid in my presentation. Met some of my new colleagues and fellow bloggers (message to blogger meet-up persons: had a great chat, thanks for taking time to have a drink with me!)

Speaking of the office--I'm back in it. My dissertation is done. My defense presentation is pretty much ready to go (just modified the job talk). I spent hours in airports and on the plane yesterday working on a manuscript that I think will make it out the door this week after another conference with other authors.

The only REAL task in front of me is grading my students' rough drafts (ugh). How will I function without 9 things that are all due yesterday??

Time to get into full graduation party planning and house hunting mode. What a nice change from recent weeks.

Dissertation Dump: Part II

Today I delivered the Big D to my committee members. It only took about 2 hours last night to print the beast. All this extra hoopla with sending pages through the printer twice in order to get the tables with horizontal orientation on the page correctly. Then, of course, I made a mistake in the title (geez, of all places!) and had to reprint the 5 title pages this morning before I made deliveries.

It hasn't quite hit me yet. I'm done. I wrote a dissertation and I will be a Ph.D. in a few short weeks. It could be the fact that in the midst of this dissertation culmination I also got the last round of revisions on a book chapter out and a revise and resubmit finished on a journal article. Could it actually be that I am on my way to becoming a professor? Might I actually be getting the hang of this gig??

Stay tuned......I need to go pack my bags. I have an early flight out tomorrow morning for a conference.

Dissertation Dump: Part I

The big D has been delivered to graduate studies for the format check!!!

Some other editing and minor changes to make over the weekend before my committee receives the D early next week. Then I'm out of town to a conference (one conference presentation finished, a second to tidy up) for a week!!!

Secret reward to myself for finishing: I'm going to do a nerd workshop at the conference (statgirl loves her stats!). Yes, I know that is totally nerdy. Can't wait!!

itunes Oracle

Everyone else has already done this one. I need a break from writing.

You're supposed to set your music player of choice to "shuffle" and then answer the following questions:

How does the world see me?
Walking on Water --Melissa Etheridge / hmmmm? Is this a good thing?

Will I have a happy life?
Plenty-Sarah McLachlan / gotta love this one!


What do my friends think of me?
Hand in my Pocket-Alanis Morissette / Again....I'm confused, who's hand is in my pocket--not sure I want it there.

Do people secretly lust after me?
Little Earthquakes-Tori Amos / Well..I guess that means..no?

How can I make myself happy?
Blood and Fire--Indigo Girls / OK...I'm not a vampire.....what am I supposed to do with this??

What should I do with my life?
Eden-10,000 Maniacs / ???

Will I ever have children?
Elsewhere-Sarah McLachlan / Phew....wasn't planning on it anytime soon.

What is some good advice for me?
Possession-Sarah McLachlan / As in...get some? I am planning on buying a home this summer.

How will I be remembered?
Taking over Me-Evanescence / Again...confused???

What is my signature dancing song?
Come to my Window-Melissa Etheridge / Certainly not a dance song......

What do I think is my current theme song?
Bring me to Life-Evanescence / As soon as my dissertation is done...I plan on getting a life.

What does everyone think my theme song is?
Ice-Sarah McLachlan / OK...this one made me laugh out loud. I used to be known as the "ice queen" among my college friends. (long story)

What song will play at my funeral?
Heavan is a Place on Earth-Belinda Carlisle / OK...I guess this works.

What type of people do I like?
Men: Don't make me come to Vegas-Tori Amos / As in..."I ain't gonna marry anyone that quick"
Women: Independent Love Song-Scarlett O' / Yes! All my friends are very strong independent women!

What is my day going to be like?
My Lover-Melissa Etheridge / Hmmmm? Will I meet my lover today??

Fun! (OK..avoidance)

Yes, I'm supposed to be writing, but I just had to take this one quiz . . .

A Bit Of Both You are 50% Calvin and 50% Hobbes

Calvin & Hobbes, like a scruffy yin and yang, are in perfect balance within you. Like Calvin, you're weird, a bit insecure, and can be a trouble-maker. But like Hobbes, you're down to earth and sensitive. It's a risk to say it here, after just a ten question test, but I'll bet you're smarter than most. Both Calvin and Hobbes are crafty, clever characters, and any one made from equal parts of each is a force to be reckoned with.

Take the Calvin & Hobbes test.

My student profile

This is profgirrrl's meme from some time ago. I've been intending to do it forever, but just now finally getting around to caring about my blog again.

Kindergarten: I went to town to go to school. I lived in a very rural community and the local rural school did not have a kindergarten class, so my dad drove me 20 minutes to town everyday for afternoon kindergarten. I was a pro at this kindergarten stuff after 2 years of preschool. However, I did run into a bit of mess when my teacher suggested that perhaps I was 'special ed' because I was extremely withdrawn and refused to participate in "reading circle". After a one on one with the school counselor, it was then discovered that I was just bored as hell and could care less about Tip and Jane. While the class was pointing out letters and the teacher read the book and talked about how the alphabet we were studying made up the words she was reading to us, I was lost in my own world thinking about what I would do with my imaginary friend when I got out of school and got home. I had already read the entire book cover to cover during playtime, it was a stupid story. I had better books at home.

Elementary School: I attended classes in a two room country school house. I had the same teacher for grades 1 -3 and the principal was my teacher in grades 4-6. There were 6 people in my class. Pretty uneventful, really. My only distinct memories are of being only the person in grade 5 band (therefore getting private music lessons from the school district) and loving the days when the art teacher came to school. We always did some pretty interesting projects that kept me occupied.

Junior High: Whoa! Going from a class size of 6 to 100 was a big change. I got a locker and thought it was pretty cool to decorate it. Best memory: 8th grade English reading A Tale of Two Cities by Dickens, I love that book and I had the best English teacher ever. I was a reader and she always had great book suggestions. I was tracked into advanced math and did well there. I was also a band geek.

High School: Band geekiness continued and there were more nerd activites as well: my most favorite--> DEBATE! I loved it and spent all my time with friends from the debate team. I discovered that homework is really overrated and didn't see much need for completing anything that wasn't interesting. I was able to get at least B's in most classes using this method of homework selection and completion. Senior year, I really started slacking...2 art classes, band, debate, and teacher's assistant--had to take English and my teacher hated me. Geez, she was boring....and the only papers that got A's were ones that were a regurgitation of exactly what she said. So, I stopped reading the assigned book and just wrote my paper from her notes (A's all the way); I got into trouble if I read the book and wrote down my thoughts (nothing better than a B-). I could not wait to get out of there....my mom thought I should go to the junior college but I applied for every scholorship possible and got money to go to a big state U.

College: Social world opened up for me. I found out that boys thought I was cute. I made the full circle of frat parties, weekend keggers, and football games. Can't say that I went to class much and I sure didn't know how to study. My GPA reflects this, although it's remarkably OK for someone who did as little as I did. I spent a summer abroad and fell in love with learning languages. I am good standardized test taker, so grad school was the obvious choice to avoid the real world.

Grad School (Round 1): After 2 different grad programs, I ended up with an MA in a language and literature. Hhhhmmm...now what does one do with that??? No clue....so I applied for fellowships to spend a year abroad and think about it. That year abroad was in so many ways the best experience I have ever had (someone who knows me IRL is laughing out loud as she reads that statement). I learned a lot about who I am and what my needs and wants are. I ignored those needs and wants, however, and came back to the US and got a teaching certificate.

Grad School Interlude: I was a teacher.....what was I thinking??? (I am a good teacher, however, K-12 setting is not for me).

Grad School (Round 2): Back for the PhD......and eventually through some twists and turns, *Statgirl* emerged.

Bracketology time!!

Wow...has there been some great basketball games today!! BC v Duke and Texas v Kansas...... can't wait for the selection show coming up soon....let the dance begin!!!

Bothered. . .

Did anyone else see this article in Inside Higher Ed? It bothers me.

Now, I'm not opposed to the idea that we need generate interest in higher ed among students who wouldn't normally consider going to college; however, I'm troubled that this might be making it too easy. Come on, bringing the admissions test to the student? Tax advisors to help with financial aid forms? Does this community college continue to provide this much personalized support to these students after they start attending classes--do they get personal shoppers for their books and school supplies? How about Homework helpline? Do the faculty come to the students home and pick them up to be sure they get to class?? These things are not realistic. Does this program potentially set these students up for failure when the hand holding is no longer there?

What I really be interested in knowing is how many of the accepted students actually enroll? Of those, how many actually complete coursework? Of those, how many complete a degree program? If these things are not happening are they really doing anything about the disparity between whites and hispanics in college?

Hhhhmmmmm?

Status Report

T minus 28 days....

• Project X is out the door again (yes, it came back for revisions from another author as I knew it would)--no big deal this time, not such difficult changes to make and I actually wrote a real discussion this time (much better than the previous "this will do for draft #1 discussion)
• Article #1 feedback is several days overdue from journal editor (which I've decided is just this way this editor works)--however this will mean a short deadline when it does appear again. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that they liked this version--I am so happy with it--the major remodeling in the last revision produced a great paper (at least in my humble opinion).
• So...now I actually have time to come back to the dissertation--> I'm reworking paper #3 and have some minimal progress on the discussion (chapter 5). I'm plugging away and still praying that I make it. I will have completed chapters--it's just a matter of if they will pass the DA stamp of approval.

Meanwhile, after reading over comments on my last draft of paper #3 from my dissertation writing group...I'm trying to figure out how this group is really benefiting me. I've wondered about this before. I often feel at the meetings that the input I get is pretty minimal. They are great people and I like them very much...I sometimes just think my area of interest is a bit too far from their own interests for them to really be able to give a lot of helpful comments. I do benefit from their comments about lack of clarity in my writing in general and this is a great help... so I don't really want to sound like I'm complaining here. I guess I just wish that I had a group that could engage more in my topic as it seems we are able to do with topics of other members in the group. In some ways, the difficulty of "getting into" my topic has to do with my own writing presentation and I am working on this; however, I also think that in some ways my topic is really just too disjoint from their work and it would be "out there" no matter how I wrote it up.

All in all, what I am discovering is that I am just really ready to be done and move on--it's time and I'm ready. Let's just tie up all the lose ends on this baby and call it complete.

Sad, but relieved.

I canceled my Europe trip today. I'm sad.

I now have 10 days in row (starting Wed.) to work on my dissertation, a manuscript revision, and a book chapter. I'm relieved.

Please, please, please, let this all come together and be over soon. And please, please, please let these 10 days be good productivie writing days, not plagued by too many blocks/issues so that I do not regret canceling this trip.

Dear Advisor,

I am sorry that you are not on top of things right now and that you are feeling overwhelmed and I realize that my hurry to meet approaching deadlines is contributing to your work and stress load. These last few days have been very difficult and strained beginning with the email exchange taking place earlier this week. I need to explain myself.

You should probably know that I had come to the conclusion that I owed you an apology for my Wed. am email response sparked by your Tues. evening message. My immediate reaction and response was emotionally charged because of the format and style of your presentation of the comments. I have worked closely with you long enough to know that this is just how you handle these types of situations. I don't like it and find it impersonal and, frankly, inappropriate but it is how you do things and I can accept that and should not "feed the fire" by letting my emotions take control.

So, on Thursday morning this is what I was ready to convey to you; that is until you caught me off guard (as you tend to do when the situation might be difficult) and the words you said engaged me yet again in the issue. In your fury of emotion, you added fuel to my fire and I am no longer willing to offer up an apology. When I discovered that you pulled the same third grade reaction that you did when we had different but similarly emotionally charged miscommunication a few years back (you took the email in question to your peers and asked them to validate your emotion), I was both enraged and hurt. While this action is not appriopriate for many reasons, I find it especially appaling in regards to something we discuss quite frequently: context. Of course your friends will validate you, you have taken the message out of the context of our relationship and introduced in into another relationship by providing it as evidence of your fairness and your "being right".

The whole issue that set me off in the beginning was that the email message you sent to me is not typical of our communication and you know it. I know you put a lot of thought into the message, worked up to writing it and clicked send knowing that is was not a typical communication. Don't you understand that your message would have been so much more effective if you had taken the 10 steps to my office, asked to talk about something that was bothering you, and said what you needed to say in probably 3 sentences? I'm hurt because I think I deserve at least that much from you. I'm angry because of the actions you took after the communication.

I was ready to let it go having said my thoughts and knowing that you know that I don't like how you communicate when it's a tough subject for you and I was ready to apologize for my own emotional email response. And, years ago, I did apologize in this somewhat similar situation because I did believe that miscommunication of years ago was my fault and I ignored the way you handled it then because our friendship was not yet clear. However, presently we are at a different place and I cannot do the same today as I did then.

As a result, this is where I now find myself:

As your student I am in a subordinate position and I will do nothing and take this interaction as a lesson learned about what not to do in the future in my interactions with you and also in my future career and dealing with my own students. I will consider context and the other person's feelings and reaction in the context of my actions and interactions with that person.

As your colleague (which I'm not quite there yet, but almost)....so... IF I were your colleague and this same interaction had occured, I would have called you immediately on your "third grade" behavior and would have expected an apology.

As your friend, I am hurt. First, if you call me your friend, you should be able to talk to me, not send a hesitant email. Second, if you call me your friend, and you find my response inappropriate, talk to me, not other friends or colleagues. Resolve the issue with me, not with others; if the friendship matters to you then it should be my forgiveness or my apology that reconciles the matter.

Your friendship is important to me and those persons who approached me quietly on the side to find out why you were yelling at me behind a closed door all got the same response from me: I told them the issue was between you and me and we would resolve it. Why don't you show me the same respect?

--*Statgirl*

Exhaustion, stress, emotion overload...

sometimes it's just all too much. I can't stop thinking about my dissertation. I wake up in the middle of the night, wide awake with thoughts. I go to bed and fall asleeep (eventually) thinking about my dissertation.
People look at me and say two words and I might cry or I might laugh hysterically. What is going on??
I'm thinking about canceling my vacation getaway because I just can't relax and I'm not even looking forward to the trip. I know my friend will be terribly disappointed, but why can't I even look forward to the chance to not have to think about this all the time?
What kind of vacation is it if I am miserable and unable to stop thinking about work the entire time? (I broke up with an ex for this reason--he couldn't leave things behind --so I know it makes for an annoying vacation companion).
I think that part of the reason is that I sort of have groove going and the constant thinking keeps me energized in a weird way, but at the same time shuts down every other facet of my existence including the desire to get away.

So should I just keep on truckin' or make myself take a break? Maybe I should ask the magic 8 ball.

Outta here!

Project X is gone!!....it has left the building!!! Yes, it's out in cyberspace on the way to the editor....with the most pathetic excuse of a discussion section ever, I might add. But--> I.Don't.Care.

Now, I know it will come back in a week or less with comments that need to be addressed; but I'm going to be OK with that...the structure is there, the "stuff" is in the paper... I can make it 'all better' then. I just want too enjoy a few days 'project x free'.
What does this say about me? I have never hated a single project so much. No other project has even warrented a name in my blog before. Hhhmmmm?

So...now I need to finish writing an exam for tomorrow.
<*statgirl* trudges slowly back to her desk after a fleeting moment of happiness>

Click 'send' for happiness!

I almost met my goal of getting 2 writing projects out the send slot in my email box this week and technically speaking (since tomorrow is really an official end of the week) I will still make the goal (although not with orginal intent which was 'end of normal people's workweek').

One paper is a revision that I am really happy with, I think it is a vast improvement over the first draf--let's just hope the editor and reviewers think so too!

The second project is--- you , guessed it! ---project X which was in track to go out to today except for some difficulties in second author's schedule today which just didn't permit those last edits. However, I expect to get it back from her tomorrow and click send then.

Then, back to regularly schedule dissertation writing. I'm officially starting a new file called "Discussion" --yes, I am finally nearing the finish line. I can see it off near the horizon.

Oh, and in less than 2 weeks I will have survived my writing marathon and will be sitting in a cafe on the other side of the big pond. I'm not sure if I will be drinking an espresso or perhaps a panache as I people watch and try not to think about writing. Hmmmm?

Software writers, What's up??

Does anyone else think that the SPSS programmer who wrote the error messages has a sick sense of humor?

"SPSS has encountered a catastrophic error. SPSS must close down and all unsaved work will be lost. "

Exam Eccentricities

I gave my first exam of the new semester yesterday.

3 students asked to borrow pencils (they were explictly told to bring them for the multiple choice section of the exam)

2 students insisted the didn't have a student ID number

1 student raised his hand to ask me what the word 'subjective' meant I teach grad students)

1 student worked on the exam for approximately 1 hour 15 minutes and then asked if there was any way she could take the exam tomorrow during my office hours--"I didn't study enough".

WTF???

Update on "the block" and a note on DA

Well, I discovered that simply venting my anger in my blog sort of pushed "the block" to the side and I made some, although nothing major, progress on writing project X. I continue to stuggle with it but plan to have it off my desk by the end of the week.

On another note, I need to clear up some misconceptions about DA. Judging by comments, I apparently villanized her a bit much. She has been nothing but supportive since the beginning of time and authorship, etc. is not in question here. And, perhaps that is why the "i'm out of the loop" comment took me so much by surprise--it is completely uncharacteristic of her. Someone must have possessed her and forced her to type that phrase which sent me into such a tizzy.

Just a few more days and the hell known as 'project X' will be in my sentbox.

The Window Thingy....

OK..everybody else is doing it...... tell me what you think in a Window on Statgirl

The Block

Ever hit a block that is primarily emotional that keeps you from making progress?

Well, I'm living it right now and I'm just about to the edge of the cliff realizing that the pent up emotion behind the block is quite likely going to push me over.

A little background: A current writing project which I have going is the result of my inability to say no when given little or no opportunity. Now, saying 'no' has always been a problem for me but generally I have gotten better at this utterance when I am able to separate myself from the immediate "questioning zone" and really ponder the pros and cons of saying 'yes'.
However, in my current dilemma, I wasn't able to get the needed space and fell into the 'yes' trap. It happened like this:

DA: Do you want to have lunch tomorrow?
Me: Sure
DA: How about pizza?
Me: Sounds good.

( lunch day, sitting at a table with my pizza)
DA: OK, I know you didn't know we were going to talk about this, but X needs to be written and here is an outline I have drafted which has already been approved. We have all the stuff, it won't be that bad.
Me: (yes, I did it...I pronounced that dreaded word, well, a derivative anyway) OK

Now, I know I am fully capable of saying the word 'no'; however, I can't help feeling like it was sprung on me and that 'no' wasn't really an option?? And maybe I'm being a total baby here but isn't part of DA's job to think about what is on my plate and provide some guidance about what is doable??? I have really tried to think about this from her point of view as well --yes, this is helping a student get a relatively easy pub for the CV, etc. But I still keep coming back to a point where I think it was really selfish (because she really needs X written and someone else was originally supposed to do it) and that she knew she was being a bit underhanded at the time because of the manner in which the job was handed over to me.

OK, that's the background. Here is the continued decline of this situation:

I've been struggling with writing project X. It isn't really MY interest and isn't something I've been working on much in the last year. But I kept telling myself that DA was going to help me through it and it would all work out. However, a recent communique from DA indicated that she is now 'out of the loop' on project X and besides, she is helping me with too much other stuff---I am so ANGRY I have been barely able to keep from throwing things and I can't even address it because if I take 2 seconds to think about it, it makes me cry!!! Out of the loop? WTF!!!!! The other things she is helping me with are things I took on myself and I am perfectly capable of handling because they feel like they are MY projects. In fact, I would not have minded doing a couple of them completely on my own. But Project X, I don't want to do it, I am not interested, and I don't even know what to really do with it. It's not my outline nor my primary area of interest. I don't feel ownership for the project, nor apparently does she. However, the people it needs to go to are important and it needs to be done well. Unfortunately, every time I open the #$%%& file on my computer I can't overcome the overwhelming anger I feel.

How do I get through this and just get writing project X to be "good enough" to be sent out and move on??

Random Ruminations: Monday version

• It's a new work week and I have my course for today prepped but not the seminar for tomorrow and I am way less than motivated to get going on it.
• 3 students have attempted to turn in an assignment that was due on Friday-- student #1 claims she didn't know it was due Friday because she doesn't have internet access on the weekends. Huhh? What? And never mind that hard copy of the syllabus you are carrying around with the dates stamped on it. Student#2 turned in the wrong assignment (so lateness is beside the point). Student #3 wrote 6 sentences, all of which have grammar or spelling errors. Now tell me that wasn't a last minute attempt for credit!
• Official letter of offer arrived from Big Research U (BRU from here forward in blogtime). Very nice to see that letterhead and mention of real money and benefits attached to my name!! Dreaming to soon commence on how to spend those start up funds and imagining the house I will buy in BRUtown.
• Should I go to the dentist this week or reschedule again (for the 3rd time)? First and second cancellations were legitimat job interview conflicts. Now I just don't want to ruin a potentially good writing work day dealing with numbness and drool.

OK, two more sentences in this post because I don't think ending with the word "drool" would leave my readers with a happy image. Happy Monday to one and all!!

Why?

Why is the one hard and fast deadline for dissertations the format check? You have to have the dissertation submitted for this at least 5 weeks before graduation. You can wait to schedule your defense just a few days before graduation, but all hell breaks loose if you miss the formatting check deadline. Just tell me why this suddenly the most important thing at this point? What if your committee requests changes at the defense? (But wait, you've already been through formatting check--what if the additions/corrections change the format??) I just don't get it. . .

Things I learned while interviewing

1. I really LIKE talking about my research and people are actually interested in what I do.
2. Always eat a big breakfast--you won't get much time to eat the rest of the day--people always ask you questions right as you are ready to take a bite. Meals are especially challenging when you have more than one person hosting you for the meal.
3. Go prepared with lots of questions--even ones you don't think people will answer, they will.
4. If you really want to know what it's like to be at that campus, ask the graduate students.
5. Graduate students' questions are very telling about the strengths and weakness of a program.
6. At your research presentation be prepared for questions on the most minute detail of your talk.
7. I found campus visits to be sort of fun--anxiety provoking, sure---but in a weird sort of way, really fun to do.
8. If it's the right job, it just feels right.
9. Be prepared to be really tired when it's over...like so tired you stumble on your name at the airport and get sent through the LONG security line for the full pat down. No....really.

Oh, and I learned several things about myself and how well I really can interact with people (even though I'm a stat nerd girl at heart). I have accepted a position that I just know is perfect for me and I can't wait to get there. Now.... if only that dissertation fairy would show up and lift me through these last few hoops.....

Helas....back to the hard work after a brief glimpse into my future at big research U.

Job Hunting: The Numbers

• 9 applications mailed out
• 7 acknowledgments of materials received
• 3 short phone interviews
• 5 invitations to campus interviews
• 2 visits to campus
• 2 research presentations given
• 1 teaching presentation given
• Approximately 45 people heard job talk (Dear Advisor heard it at least 6 times!)
• 6 airline flights (counting connections)
• 24 individual interviews with faculty members/dept. chairs/deans
• 2 group interviews with 12 graduate students
• 6 interview meals
• 3 suits worn
• 2 job offers received

AND ...... I HAVE A JOB!!!! (1 goal attained)

The Five Meme

I know I've been just lurking around...I'm busy with job interviews etc. (update soon---just to hold you over --> it is going really well).

I was tagged by Seeking Solace for this one.

Remove the blog in the top spot from the following list and bump everyone up one place. Then add your blog to the bottom slot, like so.

1) zerodoll
2) Overread
3) BrightStar
4) Seeking Solace
5) Statgirl

Next select five people to tag (Sorry!):
1) Russian Violets
2) ABD me
3) Psycgirl
4) Dice_Singer
5) Science Woman

What were you doing 10 years ago?
January 1996, I had just earned my first MA in a field in which I no longer work or study and I was dating a boy with whom I was completely enamored.

What were you doing 1 year ago?
January 2005, I was starting my second semester in my current position and was procrastinating like a pro on one of my comprehensive exam questions.

Five snacks you enjoy:
1. Chocolate
2. Lollipops
3. Anything with Nutella
4. Cheese
5. Pistachios

Five songs to which you know all the lyrics:
1. Any Melissa Etheridge song
2. Most Sarah McLachlin songs
3. Walkin' on Sunshine by Katrina and the Waves
4. Silent Lucidity by Queensryche
5. Crucify by Tori Amos

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:
1. Pay off my student loans
2. Pay off any debts belonging to my family members
3. Travel extensively--Africa first.
4. Have a huge party in an exclusive resort with all my friends
5. Invest

Five bad habits:
1. Being indecisive
2. Judging people too quickly
3. Procrastinating
4. Avoiding chores that need to be done
5. Never folding the laundry

Five things you like doing:
1.Sleeping
2. Playing games (video, cards, trivia, etc.)
3. Wine tasting
4. Dining out in nice restaurants
5. Getting massages

Five things you would never wear again:
1. Leg Warmers
2. Shoulder pads
3. Leggings with long sweaters
4. Jeans with holes in them (purposely added)
5. Bubble skirts

Five favorite toys:
1. PS2
2. My laptop
3. My cell phone
4. My martini shaker
5. My teddy bear

Back to regularly scheduled job search activities.....

Inner Rock Chick

Found at Seeking Solace.

You Are Ani Difranco!

Honest, real, and well liked.You're not limited by any boundaries."And you can call me crazyBut I think you're as lazy as white paint on the wall"

Who's" Your Inner Rock Chick?

Not sure this is who I thought my inner rock chick was.....but it's not like I really sit around and ponder this question. :-)

I am an idiot...

Just realized that I somehow turned on "moderate comments" in my settings. I was thinking all my fellow bloggers and friends had abandoned me and actually I had a whole list of fun comments. I couldn't handle rejection and desertion at this point in my year. :-)

I am who I am and gosh darn it...people like me! [This is my job search mantra.]

** Note to Seeking Solace. I finally finished my 5 weird things meme (see below)---sorry I'm so slow on responding to the tag (it's been a busy few days and the post has been a work in progress.

Stressed? Need to goof off?

How great is this??

Fun Stuff

Quiz time!

Saw this one over at the Dice_Singer --she is a Gorillaz song which I love and I also got a catchy song that makes you want to spell!!!

Your 2005 Song Is

Hollaback Girl by Gwen Stefani "This shit is bananas B-A-N-A-N-A-S)" For you, 2005 was the Best Year Ever.

What Hit Song of 2005 Are You?

Tagged

by Seeking Solace

5 Weird Things About Me

1. I hate driving. I have to drive because my city does not have decent public transportation, but I hate it. I worry about breaking down, having a flat, finding parking, being in an accident, etc. In my previous job I picked my housing so that I was close enough to walk to work. Now I have a 25 round trip commute.
2. I am a "checker" (probably borderline OCD). I'm always getting back out of bed at night to make sure I locked the front door. I check to see that the stove top is off before I leave the house.
3. I have conversations with the cat. [I know I'm not alone in this weird pet obsessed plane on which I live. Several others have admitted this.]
4. I do not have huge need of having people around me. At the extreme, I detest crowded places. On a more daily basis--I have a stong desire/need to have some alone time. I never spend time with friends more than 2 (or 3 max) evenings a week. I like quiet evenings with my books or a movie and a cup of hot tea. :-)
5. I love math equations, logic puzzles, etc. Yes, I am the person on the airplane who did all 6 of the soduku puzzles in the newest Skyways magazine and didn't save any for the next passenger to board the plane!

Pooped.

Exhausted.

Tired.

Worn out.

Going to bed.

I made it

to work before 10 am today. This is progress this week...still struggling to get back into the swing of things. Tomorrow I shooting for a 9 am arrival. Keep your fingers crossed.

Next week classes begin and I have my first interview ....must find energy somewhere. Didn't get to give my practice presentation today; however, I gave it again at home to my dining room wall (and kitty, of course). Kitty thinks its a bit of a bore and needs some spicing up. I've decided I need to cut down my intro somehow and spend more time on my model. So, again, some adjustments to make and finally tomorrow a realy audience, my advisor and whoever else I can round up at the office.

Need to copy syllabi and submit a couple more applications as well tomorrow. I'm thinking of including an app. to a post-doc position as well--just for good measure. It's actually working on a project in which I'm very much interested and even though my final goal is tenure-track faculty positon--who knows? Might as well keep the options open.

Personal life sucks right now---just to work and back home each day. I'm looking forward to my card game tmorrow night and a little kicking back before the wheel of the winter semester really gets rolling. Hopefully, I'll be able to maintain a good routine and stay on top of things this semester. I suppose I should really spell out my semester plan and goals ---perhaps on my next post.

Chugging along....

Final syllabus is drafted! Not finalized and I'm leaving it a bit open so as to be able to add more readings etc. later on. However, I'm a firm believer in syllabus as contract so I have all the assessments hashed out and grade weighting determined. Details of assignments, etc. can be put off for a few days.

I also found out I'm only going to be teaching 2 courses instead of my usual three--unfortunately I lose one of my favorite classes to teach, but on the plus side am keeping "my old standby" which I've taught so many times I can answer questions weeks before they are asked. :-) And I'm still teaching the 'new prep' as well. My course reduction is a result of someone else's course not making and a shift in the schedule. I guess my dept. chair likes me well enough and recognizes I do my share of committee work (I'm on a super important one right now) and I'm also finishing the diss and job hunting. So it's not like I'll really get to enjoy the 'extra' time.

A successfull run through of my research presentation for my upcoming interview resulted in a few changes and tweeks. Going to give a practice presentation tomorrow to a couple of friends and then move on to a larger audience on Monday. So far...it's coming along. I've only wished about 20 times that I would have something simple like a 't test ' to present. :-) No! I had to do somehting fancy in my dissertation--I never considered the fact I would have to present this complicated monster to strangers in hopes of getting a job! Actually, I think it will be fine and hopefully my "natural teacher" inside will come out and help me break it down so a highly intellegent non stat nerd can understand my analysis.

Slowing crawling back to the surface....

Made it to work today only about 2 hours later than when I would normally go into the office--officially, I'm blaming it on changing time zones during my vacation and having some difficulty getting going in the morning. Or it could just be the dread of the semester ahead.... I'm not starting out with my "clean slate" like usual--I'm behind on projects and have several deadlines already looming. I want to throw a tantrum and scream "it's not fair!" However, I dug myself into this hole and I will eventually crawl out.

I'm starting to feel like I am gaining a bit of ground. I handed off the book chapter to second author today --aka DA--with the realization that I can't continue to depend on her to save me when I'm in a time crunch. However, in this situation I'm not feeling very much guilt because I don't really think I should have taken this project on. Yes, I'm a big girl and I can say 'no' to people but it's hard sometimes when you don't have warning and the next thing you know you have a project on your hands. As I recall, this one arrived on my plate over lunch (with no warning--I thought it was just a friendly take a break, walk to lunch, and then 'poof' I had an outline and a mission). In hindsight I really think I should have chosen not to accept it; however, at the time that didn't appear to be an option. Well, I have lived and learned. Next time will be different. (I better bookmark this post for future reference.)

I also have all my laundry done and I went grocery shopping today on my way home from the office--isn't it weird how sometimes these little things are really what makes your day????

Back to life, back to reality...

Wasn't that a song in the 80's?

Anyway, my blogroll is back up and functioning--I've checked all the links and been out a reading....all of us have been a bit slower than usual over the holidays. Ho Hum.....

Finally made it to my office today after a sleep in and a bit of retail therapy. I bought a new suit for the upcoming interviews. Not that I really needed another, I just like having several options--and I have been in a pants frame of mind of late and I want comfort! It will be hard enough for me to be "on point" for 2 days straight with strangers. I'm one who likes to sit back and observe a bit, however, I'm sure this isn't a good strategy nor would even be possible on a job interview. So, I'm practicing my smile and focusing on me (with the purchase of comfortable clothing) and trying to get over the idea of having to sell myself to get a job. And this gives me the excuse to go out this weekend and buy a new pair of shoes to go with the new suit. I love shoes!

In other news, I have 2 syllabi ready to roll and am about halfway done with the last one. It's a new class for me so I'm keeping it 'roomy' so I can stretch and be flexible a bit. It's all doc students in the class so hopefully they will be able to deal with that.
My book chapter sort of looks like a chapter--with sections and everything-- however, I still hate it and hate writing it, and just wish it were over. Why do I let myself be talked into things like this?---oh yeah, I'm ABD looking for a job and I'm adding to my Vita. Geez...... might as well paste it on my forehead.

Speaking of jobs (again)--need to organize and practice that job talk.

Reorganizing....

Well, in the attempt to recover comments....I accidently deleted sections and ended up changing my template. Since it's the last day of the year, I'm just going to keep with this "out with the old, in with the new" theme and do a little re-arranging. Will get my blogroll up and going again soon.....

Missing comments?

???

Busy Vacation Day

• Slept in until 9ish
• Cup of hot tea in my PJ's
• Quick shower
• Off to a pedicure
• Then a dose of reflexology
• Followed by 1 hour hot rock massage
• Afternoon snack of : Tartine with chevre, pommes frites, du vin
• Dessert of chocolat chaud--the extra thick kind you can "drink" with a spoon
• A bit of shoe shopping
• 3 hours in the movie theatre for "Munich"
• Bedtime blogging.....

Ahhhh......vacation!!!!

Change of Scenery?

I have had the most productive day of all ... the first one in many weeks..AND I AM ON VACATION! My host had a prior work engagement today and I have spent the day sitting and working diligently. Is it the fact that I am not in my own home or my own office? Is it the clearer mind after several days away from it all during the holidays? Is it the sense of impending doom if I don't get my butt in gear?? Whatever it is ...thank you! I needed a day of moving forward.

Holiday Backlog..

OK...so I haven't posted in forever. The holidays are exhausting and I need a vacation from them---so I'm taking one. Visiting a friend who lives near water--big difference for midwestern me. Hanging out, sleeping in, cooking good food, and just relaxing. It's great!!

Christmas Recap: Can you say "too much to drink"? Whew...survived it with a few quality moments with the porcelin god and a lot of sleep. It was a great party...need I say more?

Christmas Eve Recap: Spent the evening baking bread and cookies, and wrapped up in a warm blankie with the kitty. It was nice and cozy.

On the horizon: 2 campus interviews!! Yes, count them..... I'm so excited. Both are in great places and have different but very good things to offer. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Back to my vacation.....

Done grading!!! Grades turned in! Hallalujah!!

So what am I doing?....avoiding writing (which was due 2 weeks ago, technically speaking. I'm catching up on reading blogs....

oh, and throw a personality quiz in too!:

Your Personality Is

Rational (NT) You are both logical and creative. You are full of ideas. You are so rational that you analyze everything. This drives people a little crazy! Intelligence is important to you. You always like to be around smart people. In fact, you're often a little short with people who don't impress you mentally. You seem distant to some - but it's usually because you're deep in thought. Those who understand you best are fellow Rationals. In love, you tend to approach things with logic. You seek a compatible mate - who is also very intelligent. At work, you tend to gravitate toward idea building careers - like programming, medicine, or academia. With others, you are very honest and direct. People often can't take your criticism well. As far as your looks go, you're coasting on what you were born with. You think fashion is silly. On weekends, you spend most of your time thinking, experimenting with new ideas, or learning new things.

The Three Question Personality Test

Yup! That's me.... what do my Friends in real life think?

Random Holiday Fun Stuff

I've been grading ALL DAY. Can't take it anymore ...just need to do something fun.

You Are Blitzen

Always in good spirits, you're the reindeer who loves to party down with Santa. Why You're Naughty: You're always blitzed on Christmas Eve, while flying! Why You're Nice: You mix up a mean eggnog martini.

Which of Santa's Reindeer Are You?

OK....hhmmm? Eggnog martinis.....possibilities???

You Are "Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer"

Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeerHad a very shiny nose.And if you ever saw him,You would even say it glows. For you, Christmas is a mix of tradition and fun.You're not above strapping on a red blinking nose for a laugh.

What Christmas Carol Are You?

Definitely a reindeer theme here......

Your Christmas is Most Like: The Muppet Christmas Carol

You tend to reflect on Christmas past, present, and future...And you also do a little singing.

What Movie Is Your Christmas Most Like?

Muppets.....oooh! Oooh! Which one am I? Maybe Gonzo??

You Are a Fruitcake!

You taste like nothing else in this world.And get ready, you're about to get tossed!

What Crappy Gift Are You?

Fruitcake...it figures.

Thast's my fun for the day. Now I want my friend Dr. Dice Singer to do at least one of these and giggle about it....she needs a smile today.
I also think that Russian Violets has been lost in grading land too long and should also participate in some mindless quizzes as well.
Will be looking for your posts!!

.... and to all a good night. --Statgirl

G.R.A.D.I.N.G.

The grading pile doesn't seem to be shrinking very quickly. Yesterday I returned a set of papers, only to be rewarded with that classes' final exams to now grade. Still 2 more exams to give this week .....and then grade. Oh well, exams do grade much faster than research papers.

On the topic of research papers:
Hats off to my students who actually followed directions and kept up with me during the semester working on each section of their paper near the time we discussed the section topic in class. Way to go! I'm seeing great work that demonstrates a real understanding of how it all fits together.

Raspberries to those students who thought they could write their first ever research proposal the night before it was due. You are doing silly things like: eliminating variables through sampling, citing the actual point of your study as a threat to validity, failing to consider the ethics of your study, not demonstrating any potential impact or importance of your study, failing to show how your study builds on prior research, and running short on time (I hope this is your excuse) and lifting entire sentences from published research in your attempts to summarize other peoples research. [FYI: This is PLAGIARISM.]


Now...back to the stack of papers and the comedy of errors....I just wish I were laughing.

Focus Factor

Well, even thought the list of 'to do's was long...very little was accomplished today. Other than minimal organizing and much procrastination my time in the office was wasted. This was immediately followed by a near panic attack when I arrived home and began assessing what all must be accomplished in the next 2 weeks. Of course, most of this anxiety was brought on by the attempt to "make my list"--no need to check it twice--there is much shopping to be done. Geez I hate shopping ..especially when it involves cold weather and long lines.

Back from a blogging break.

Yes, I am still alive....if anyone even noticed I was gone [besides Seeking Solace who gave me a 'shout out'--thanks :-) ]. I have had a few days where I felt I needed to be a bit more introspective and let some things brew. Furthermore, nothing more exciting going on in my academic world that what has been covered brilliantly by the rest of my fellow academic bloggers.

Follow-up to birthday blogging of last week: I left work early with DA and went grocery shopping and then spent the rest of the afternoon cooking a spectacular birthday dinner with her. Very fun! I love to cook and I find that it is much more fun sharing the kitchen with others and talking and laughing as you go--hard to do when you live alone and have a tiny apartment kitchen that is not conducive to guest chefs. Thankfully, DA and GB have a wonderful kitchen made for friends and my birthday dinner was great!!!

Weekend update: Spent the weekend getting caught up on household chores and laundry--first real chance to do so after being out of town for Thanksgiving. Also spent much quality time with the kitty.

Beginning of this week: Furious end of semester grading, updating Blackboard, and dealing with various student issues. Cleaning of the office --had to get rid of some of the dead balloons and sagging crepe paper in my office as well as find the bottom of my desk (yes, we go a bit crazy sometimes with the birthday decos). Used some of my blogger buddies suggestions to put together gifts for my secret santa. So far so good---although I think she may have figured out already who I am. Actually, I'm thinking that my secret santa gifter may also be my giftee. Not sure yet...but I have defnitely eliminated a couple of possibilities. Good sign of the week: Now that application deadlines have passed for some of the jobs I applied for, I got my first phone call this week which has rescued me from the "what if no one wants me?" syndrome which creeps up on me at unexpected moments.

Middle of week: SNOW!!! Lots of it--so much that my very last class didn't happen because the university canceled classes. Should be interesting getting the final papers turned into me now--wonder how many students will ignore my email about turning them in by tomorrow and will just show up at the final exam next week with the paper in hand saying they didn't received the email and just couldn't figure out what to do ---but they had the paper done, of course.

Today: Pajama day--I have been so tired and just D. R. A. G. G. I. N. G. I spent the entire day at home in my PJ's (well almost, put on sweats to go outside and clean my car off and dig a path so I can get out of my parking spot tomorrow). I slept over 14 hours in the past 48. Did I work on the book chapter that has to get finished ASAP? No. Did I finish writing my final exams? No. Did I work on something that would progress my dissertation? No. I played video games. Actually just one game--Crash Twinsanity--Is it just me, or are the save points really far apart in this game???

That's it for true confessions today. I'm finishing my tea and going to bed I'ved jotted down my 'to do' list. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day.

Secret Santa Ideas?

I have 2 weeks to spoil my Secret Santa person at work---who has good ideas for little inexpensive gifts???

Birthday Blogging!!!

It's my birthday!! And I'm done reading ALL my students rough drafts---only the final set of papers in one week!

Hey!! It's my birthday!!! It's my birthday!!!

Funniest note left by someone on my door--> "How many degrees of freedom in a happy birthday?" ---yes, I'm a nerd. :-)

Ignoring my blog, too......

Not only did I manage to ignore all the ridiculously stupid emails I received in last few days, but I have also negleted my blog and received a few email prods to post.

Well, what can I say? It's the same song and dance as everyone else here in the academic corner of the blogosphere--things are winding down and there is much grading to be done.

My favorite student writing of the day--> An entire section in their research proposal about "constant variables"--this followed, of course, the section about the independent, dependent, and extraneous variables. Hello!? Got brain??? What do those words mean (in ANY context)?!

I will try to get more in the blogging spirit very soon.

Regrouping and ignoring student emails.

It's cold outside and I am breaking out the sleepy bear hot tea. MMmmmmm.....

There were a few snow flurries today and, of course, I got an email from a student wanting to know if we would have class---I ignored the email.

And I know I didn't really get that other email asking about something we covered in week 3 of the class which is uber important for the final paper which is due this week. I surely imagined that email.

Best of all, I didn't see the post on the blackboard discussion board asking about the homework assignment which I discussed for at least 10 minutes in class last week--that student couldn't be serious about asking where to locate the article that has been referenced in the last 6 homework assignments and is listed on page 1 of the syllabus with a note that says 'bring to class each week to use in class work/discussion'....

No...I'm sure I have imagined all of this.

Time for statgirl to drink her tea and go curl up in her warm bed with a book.

It's good to be home!!

Yea! I'm back home and finishing up my laundry and almost ready to 'turn in' in my own bed. Miss Kitty is still walking around 'kitty bitching' that I left her alone for a few days. What a wonderful thing it is to return home.

All in all, a good short break from reality.....but tomorrow "Reality Strikes Back"

To do list:

1. Finish class prep #1
2. Read 2 articles for class prep #2
3. Read and comment on multiple rough drafts.
4. Score homework assignments.
5. Write exam review.
6. Begin writing/revising final exams.
7. Major work on book chapter.
8. Dissertation data needs some cleaning....

Big projects on the horizen 'to do' list:

1. Revise article #1
2. Reorganize and polish article #2
3. Analyze data/write paper #3
4. Revise/add to paper #4
5. Finish syllabi for Spring semester

OK..public accountability is putting an undeniable end to the holiday---off to bed for one last evening of reading for fun.

As seen at Russian Violets. . .

Your Life is Like

Being John Malkovich

What John Cusack movie are you?

Hmmmm? ..I really liked this movie...but I hope I'm not really living it.



You have the Rossetti girl look. You are the kind
of girl pre-Raphaelite painters admired; tall,
slender, and fair as a lily flower. The
pre-Raphaelite girl had dramatic beauty; long
neck, large soulful eyes, full shapely mouth
and masses of wavy hair. The pre-Raphaelites
painted girls like this, they showed them in
dramatic situations dressed as famous
characters in legends, plays and poetry. The
favourite colours of the artists were russet,
green and gold. The following artists would
have loved to paint you; Holman Hunt, John
Everett Millais, Edward Burne-Jones, William
Morris and Dante Gabriel Rossetti.

'Pretty As A Picture' - Which Artist Would Paint You?

Not so sure about this one.....

I am thankful.... (one day late)

Now that the eating has ceased..... (wow! was it good! traditional turkey plus slow cooked in a smoker ribs....mmmmmm!)

The Thankful List:

1. My Life: I'm healthy, happy and have a great day to day existence.
2. My family and friends: I have people around me who love and care for me. I'm especially thinkful for DA, GB, and the Dice Singer who have been so supportive of me during this job hunting/dissertation finishing escapade.
3. My cat: She's the bestest, cutest, most cattitudinal pet ever!
4. My job: I love getting up and going to work (yes, even on Saturdays).
5. My home: It's small, but comfortable.

Blast from the Past.

I just spent the evening with someone I went to high school with--I haven't seen Aeroboy since our 10 year reunion? Our parents were friends for years and he is only 10 days older than I so we have baby pictures of us hanging together in the playpen. Six years of middle and high school together and then college degrees from rival universities. Both of us, oddities among our counterparts from small midwestern town (SMWT)-- we talked of how similar our lives have been: first there were wedding inivites and then baby announcements. Both of us still single ....and liking it that way for now. Neither of us willing to settle. It's good to live a single life and be mobile--he contracts work out and travels all along the east coast. I only visit SMWT once a year--he has been back twice in the past 3 years. We sit and listen to our mothers recount the local SMWT gossip and realize that although time passes quickly in our days, little has changed in SMWT. The only difference with each visit is how much our parents have aged and topics of their conversations.

Sluggish Tuesday

I was all geared up for a day of uninterrupted writing and research work..and??

Well, I could have had it...but it slipped away. I was so sluggish and unmotivated that I ended up clearing smaller tasks off my desk and avoiding the big jobs at hand. So??

I'm packing up articles in my backpack for the Thanksgiving holiday....

Maybe freedom from my office will inspire writing??

Whew...

Not that I was worried...but being Statgirl and all, I wouldn't want to fail at this quiz!!

You Passed 8th Grade Math

Congratulations, you got 10/10 correct!

Could You Pass 8th Grade Math?

Countdown to the holiday

I only have to work 2 days this week but I need to accomplish what I would normally do in 5--so when am I supposed to get it done?

I've spent my morning prepping a class for today that several students will skip "because Thanksgiving is 3 days away"--what is up with that? The university doesn't close until Wednesday. I hereby vow to myself to not repeat anything that I cover today next week when the skippers return--I will answer any question that pertains to todays lecture with "you should check the powerpoint notes and textbook for the answer to that--we covered it last week". ---Yeah, right, let's see if I can really stick to that!?

Update: Not as many absent as I guessed there would be---I will be able to stick to my vow of not repeating next week.

Tomoroow I plan to show up in jeans and my most comfy sweatshirt for a day full of research related work... please, oh, please, let it be productive.

I am more than my soda?

OK--day 4 with no soda and therefore no caffeine (other than the small amount from a few Hershey's kisses with cherry filling--great limited edition holiday flavor!) and I am dragging......like really slow. I'm tired and kind of cranky---I'm having to work hard to maintain an acceptable attitude.

I have considered the probable causes:

1. I'm going home for a few days?--eliminated this one, because I am actually looking forward to the trip for once. I have some work to take with me, a couple good books and I should be fine.
2. The job search stress?---well, eliminate this one as well--not really feeling the crunch yet and I think I have a good shot at several of the places I applied. My CV is in decent shape for a new grad, I have pubs and I have teaching experience with great evals, I have done some service and feel like I am really prepared to be in a tenure-track position. I am confident about interviewing well (I have as much if not more personality than most 'nerds' in my field)--I just need an interview and I am secure that something will come along, it's early in the game.
3. End of semester run down?--elimiate this one too---the end of the semester is my favorite time, I'm almost done with this group of students--just one lecture plus review day to go before I give the final exams. Then I will have several days to just work on my writing/research---I can't wait!!
4. So? --Well, it must be my new found freedom from sugar/caffiene that I was loading into my body. How many days to really get through withdrawel??

I'm really hoping that after these days of "in a funk for no reason" are followed by a new found 'high' living without all the caffeine and that I get my optimism back and stop feeling so tired. Don't want to keeping dra....gggg...iiiinnnn....ggggg.......

HP

Harry Potter was great!!! Even though many parts of the book were abbreviated and many characters' roles where smaller than usual, all expected appearances occured and it was a great film. I'm placing it second in the HP series---still like the original the best.


*** PS I'm also successfully making through my third day of soda free life. Hanging in there for now.

I'm going to a movie!

I realize this is a typical friday activity for many people--however, it has been almost 2 years since I last set foot inside the door of a movie theatre. With HBO and all the regular cable television offerings, I don't usually feel the need to pay more money to sit in a room with strangers and watch the big screen. Plus, with trying to write a disseration while keeping up with my full time job--watching anything isn't really a priority. So TV does me just fine.....

However, tonight is special--it is HARRY POTTER!!!

Confessions of a soda junkie.....

Sometimes I drink 4 or 5 sodas a day and I drink "the real thing" --all the caffeine and all the sugar--39 grams in one of those little cans!! And I learned today from my dentist that I am the worst kind of soda junkie: I'm a "sipper"--I keep a can on the desk at all times and keep tipping it back all day long. I learned that even if I drank an entire case in one sitting I would do less damage to my teeth. But instead, I coat my teeth in sugar and just when it starts to wear off, I drench them again. So what to do???

I can't stand the diet stuff ---if I could take it, it might be worth risking brain cancer from the asperteme instead of rotting all my teeth.

All the other drinks I like are also high in sugar--my naked fruit juice in the morning ( 20-30 g/bottle) and yes, I checked around---the natural sugar is just as bad for your teeth as sugar in soda (well, close enough anyway---and remember, I am a "sipper" which compounds the problem).

Now that it is getting colder I do drink a lot of hot tea and I don't add any honey or sugar so maybe this will help to control my need to sip and save my enamel? But what will I do when it is warmer? And will tea really take the place of my soda habit?--it's doubtful.....

Temperature Tantrum!

Yes! I'm having a tantrum about the temperature--first it was 70 degrees a couple of days ago, then yesterday it snowed! Now today it is sunny, but only 29 degrees!! Crazy as this is I can live with it.
What I cannot live with is the temperature controlled environments that I live and work in--
(1) Yesterday I woke up to a room temp of 52 degrees because the heat in my home was not working. After a long conversation with the maintenance man about how I was unwilling to wait until "sometime in the afternoon" for him to diagnose my heating problem because he didn't understand my polite request for help--finally after saying "dude, it's snowing outside and I have no heat", he agreed to be there before 10am. So I was very happy when I arrived home yesterday evening to my cozy kitty basking in the 68 degree comfort of working heat.
(2) Now today, I am sitting in my university office which is registering a temperature over 80 degrees! It's 29 degrees outside--I've peeled all the layers I can peel without being dismissed for indecent exposure. Do we really only have one thermostat for 3 huge office suites? Persons in 2 of the 3 suites are suffering from heat exhaustion and the HVAC people do not think this is problem?? WTF???

Now a cranky and sweaty statgirl will return to her writing....

A girl needs friends...

I just spent and hour on the phone with Dr. DiceSinger. She is also looking for a tenure track position and it's nice to share our experiences, expectations, and worries. Even though we are in different (but related) fields applying for different kinds of jobs, she is doing the same things, wondering about the same things, and dreaming about the same things. Perhaps even more importantly, we have similar world views and we tend to be very positive optimistic people. It's good to have a friend like the Dice Singer!!!

Other friends:

NG didn't come to work today...so it was quiet...and if my phone rings after 10pm--I am NOT answering it.

Beachgirl's car was stolen out of her garage!!! Shocker---she left the garage door open and the next morning it was gone. Her birthday is coming soon...hopefully I can cheer her up.

DA got to work at home all day yesterday in her PJ's--I'm so jealous.

MMMoonnnddddaayy

It's cold out today--after an atypical fall season thus far, it suddenly IS fall and according to the weatherman: tomorrow it will be winter!! Wait! I'm not good with sudden change. I need time to aclimate myself. Today I am actually enjoying the fact that my office has no windows.

Meanwhile in studentland.....

I, *statgirl* pledge to: (1) not answer any email that contains a question whose answer can readily be accessed on the syllabus --oh no, you lost your syllabus? --look at the copy on Blackboard!, (2) respond quickly and curtiously to all students who submit the rough draft ON TIME, (3) ignore and delete those rough drafts that are submitted AFTER the deadline, (4) deny all requests to turn in late homework assignments from students who just now realized that the optional homework assignments would have helped their grade.

Note to self: I will never again have a "homework optional" component to any of my courses because in this trial semester, the students for whom I designed the assignments did not do them.

Another installment of "Random Sunday Thoughts"

Sunday has defnitely become my cleansing day--literally and figuratively. I always clean my house and do laundry and in the process unwind from last weeks events and prepare for a new week. Here is this weeks top thoughts--some enduring and other just frickin' annoying.....

1. NG called me last night at 10:40 (!) to tell me that her conference proposal received the highest ratings of them all. Whoopty-f@%&in'--Do! And no, I'm not bittter--my own proposal ratings were great--I just think it's weird to announce this and it's certainly not worthing of getting me out of bed.
2. I've got a TON of writing to get done this week--too bad I can't crawl under a rock and hide from my students. Worst of all, it is literature review type work which I absolutely detest!!
3. Another round of job applications going out tomorrow and I must make a decision about applying to "good job in less than desirable location"....hhhmmm? I'm leaning toward 'no' seems like there are more than enough jobs posted this year.
4. The new Harry Potter film opens on Friday--yee haw!!

Tastes Meme

Dr. Crazy invented this one and since I need to go to the grocery store today this seems like an appropriate post.

Favorite food on a cold, rainy, fall day: Soup, of course! Chili, maybe? or perhaps aspargus soup made by DA ?--> mmmmmmm!!
Favorite food on a hot, humid, summer day: No food, just beer--Corona with lime. OK, if I have to have food with that---I like country ham and a couple cornichon on a baguette with just a touch of butter.
Favorite food when I'm feeling depressed or PMS-y: Chocolate and California Rolls (no--not together! Yuck!) Anything really greasy and bad for me is a close second.
Favorite food that is an embarassment to enjoy eating, because for some reason a lot of people find it gross: Mashed potatoes, with peas or corn, all covered in chicken gravy.
Favorite dinner made by my mother: Thankgiving/Christmas--traditional style : turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, blueberry pie.
Favorite dinners made by my grandmother: I used to love to back blueberry muffins with my grandma when I was young and she taught me how to make the best pie crust ever as well. I like it with peach or blueberry the best!
Favorite dinners made by me: I have lots of recipes I like--just depends on my mood. And I love preparing something new that I find in a cookbook or food magazine. Cooking is a very grounding process for me and helps me to unwind.
Favorite desserts that I make: Red Velvet Cake, White Wedding Cake, Chocolate Mousse, and Gingerbread.

And I need to add a category:

Favorite Appetizer or Snack-y Food: Cheese! Boursin, comte, port salut, chevre, bleu . . . (and a glass of red wine, please!)

The Waiting Game (A Job Quest Update)

This one is a request from Sheepish. . .

Several apps. are out the door, a few confirmations of 'full app. on file' have been received.
I contemplate a few more recent postings with looming deadlines. But mostly. . . . I wait.

My Earliest Memory

A request from Jo(e). . .

This one is rather difficult in many ways. As I thought back and reflected on my childhood memories, I was plagued with thoughts of "is this really MY memory?" or "is this a story someone in my family told me about my early years?" The more I contemplate this, the more intrigued I have become with memories. Which ones are really 'mine' and which ones feel like they belong to me because I have heard the story repeated so many times by my family?

So finally arriving at a memory that I am certain is my own. . . I was about 2 years old and playing in my sisters room (a corner of which was my room), I remember a lavender color for some reason, although I'm pretty sure the room was pink? Maybe it WAS lavender when I was very young. I was on my sister's big bed and noticed a stuffed horse at the end of the bed. It was tall enough that I could see the white tufts of mane on the top of the horsey's head. I don't remember the action of getting to the horse, although I'm sure it consisted of my sliding off the edge of the bed and onto the horsey's back. What I do remember vivedly is approximately 2 seconds of joy as I sat atop the horse before one of the horse's stuffed animal legs gave way under my two-year old body and I fell to the floor.

The interesting thing about this memory is that it stays with me because of guilt, I knew it was something I should not do but I did it and I most likely left the toy 'broken' by adding some additional flexability to a stuffed animal that was meant to have a ridged form. I do not recall being 'in trouble' as a result of this incident or any memory of my sister even finding out what I had done. There was no punishment (or at least no memory of it) for this incident and yet I know it happened. What does ths say about me? My earliest memory is such an insignificant incident (perhaps not even noticed by others) and it is fixed in place by feelings of guilt?

I've lost that blogging feeling....

Sorry...just nothing too exciting going on right now.

I explained the difference in the t test and the F test to someone today...... uh...... I graded some not so exciting homework assignments from my students. I'm working on writing an exam. I've got 2 papers bumping around in my noggin'.....but nothing exciting to write on my blog. >sigh<

I guess I could go with Profgrrrl's latest stategy...what do you want me to write about? It's not really my style....but maybe I need to rely on someone else's ideas for now.

Monday Movies....

I had no time to watch a movie today, it was just a typical Monday--busy and long. Nothing exciting to blog about so I'm going to do that movie list that has been seen EVERYWHERE by now.

I think I'm breaking the rules...it's supposed to be 15 films from the past 15 years.....some of these are older and maybe I won't make it to 15. I haven't been to a movie theatre in over a year--so movies don't really have high priority in my life; however, there are several that I enjoy watching over and over. (And I'm too tired to link them, sorry.)

1. The Shawshank Redemption
2. Dangerous Liasons (any of the 3 versions around --athough my favorite is the 80's version with Glenn Close and John Malkovich)
3. What Dreams May Come
4. Life is Beautiful
5. American Beauty
6. Like Water for Chocolate
7. Less than Zero/ St. Elmo's Fire ( really like Andrew McCarthy---he's a 'hotty body' and those soft features---the lips....OOooooohh!!)
8. The Hours
9. Out of Africa
10. Harry Potter films
11. Au Revoir Les Enfants
12. Heathers / Jawbreaker
13. L'Auberge Espagnol

OK..made it to 13. Lucky 13! And with that, I'm off to dreamland.

Random Sunday Thoughts. . .

1. I should be ironing clothes for this week but the pants I laundered today are not yet dry. I can't put them in the dryer because I am 'the woman with 8 foot legs'. (see Jo(e) for details).
2. I am counting down the number of class periods remaining in the semester. Is is over yet?
3. My 'to do' list for classes this week doesn't look to bad--I may actually make some progress on my own research/writing. Could that even be possible?
4. NG called me last night at 11:30!!!! If I am not out at a social gathering, I am defnitely tucked under the covers by 11pm (usually with a good book) and I DON'T want to be bothered.
5. The leaves are really pretty and a recent lack of wind/rain is keeping them hanging around longer than usual this year. Why do I spend my free day inside cleaning etc. when I could be out enjoying Fall?
6. I tried to call my friend Cat Lady last night, and about 4 times today. I also tried last weekend. Considering the only communication with her lately has been short and sweet emails, maybe I've angered her (again?). How do I always do this?
7. I will have a great week this work week, I can feel it.

Getting started again is the hardest part.

It's Friday and I've taught all my classes this week, finished all the grading and even have prepped (well, about 10% remaining) for next week. So I'm finally ready to get 'back into' my work, meaning my research, writing projects. Why is this so hard??

I have terrible difficulty picking back up where I left off. What was the next step going to be? How do I get back into that mindset where I was really thinking about this project? Hmmm....

My Life

Saw this at the amazing Russian Violets page (she is also a "buttmunch" at love--hmmm...common thread among academic types???? ).

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	6.8
Mind:	7.2
Body:	7
Spirit:	5.9
Friends/Family:	4.5
Love:	3.1
Finance:	7.8
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

Music Meme

I found this at Brightstar --music and memories--how fun!!

Song I always put on mix CD's: "Walkin' on Sunshine"--Katrina and the Waves
Song I try to woo people with: hmmm...music...wow, never thought of that-I'm always trying to get people to like me for me--what's wrong with that???
Song that reminds me of my childhood: ?? no answer for this one
Song that takes me back to high school : "Lean on me"--Club Nouveau
Song that takes me back to college: "I think we're alone now"--Tiffany (Ok that was even embarassing to type)
Song that always makes me cry: "Silent Lucidity" --Queensrych
Song that takes me to my happy place: Anything 80's
Song I play to get the party started: depends on who is at the party....
First concert attended: Michael Jackson-Victory Tour/Thriller
last concert attended: Last 3--Elton John, Sarah McLachlan Alanis Morissette
artist I've seen most often in concert: Easy one...Melissa Etheridge
first record/CD I bought: Culture Club--Colour by Numbers
last record/CD I bought: Tori Amos--The Beekeeper
album I love falling asleep to: Sarah McLachlan-- Mirrorball
album I love waking up to: no music in the morning...news.
Best after-hours album: not sure what "after hours" means here---after the party is over? Pink Floyd--The Wall, of course!
Best song/album for falling in love: Now, if I knew the answer to this one I would be in love, no such luck. :-(
best song/album for breaking up: Alanis Morissette
Guilty pleasure music: Musical music --Rent

>sigh<

Dear Stu Dent,

Why do you come to my office and talk to me about how much you care about your grade and then leave class early during the break?

Statgirl