Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Student Dillusions

A series of emails has bombarded my email today--all from "Student Who IS the Center of the Universe (SWISCU):

Background info: SWISCU emails to request appoint on Monday. Request is denied because it is a holiday weekend and I am not in the office on Monday. SWISCU is also reminded that before whining about a course grade there are several homework assignments and test prep opportunities available that have not been recieved from SWISCU. SWISCU ignores these assignments and continues to whine. . .

this am (approximately 2 hours before the class I teach) :

Dear Statgirl,

I need to meet with you today either before or after your class to talk about my grade. If I do not get a response to this email before class time, I will just drive to campus and wait for you after class.

--SWISCU


SWISCU,

I am unable to meet with you today--all my appointment times are full. I do have times available tomorrow at 1pm and 2:30 pm. Would either of those work for you?

---Statgirl


1 hour later:

Statgirl,

I don't understand. When I emailed you last time you said you couldn't meet Monday but that you would be available on Wednesday.


--SWISCU


SWISCU,

Your last email was 1 week ago, at that time appointments were still available. However, now they have been filled. Sorry.

--Statgirl (not really believing that student thinks same day appointments are reasonable)


10 minutes later:

Statgirl,

You should not state that times are available and then not save them for a student. I needed to see you because this class is extremely important to me. I must pass this class in order to finish my degree. Can you find time in your schedule?

--SWISCU


SWISCU,

There are more than 40 students enrolled in XXXX class. Other students have filled those appointment spots since your inquiry 8 days ago. I do not save an appointment time with just an inquiry about available times. You cannot expect to get an appointment on the same day as your email request--especially not the week of an exam. You need to plan ahead. You also need to complete the assignments provided to assist you in test prep. I reply to all emails within 24 hours and am happy to review your work before tomorrow.

-Statgirl (Who does this Stu Dent think s/he is??)

30 minutes later:

So can I still email you the exam practice and will you respond before the exam?

--SWISCU

[Well.....DUH....does this Stu Dent even read my reply???]

SWISCU proceeds to email me the practice work from the previous exam (not the current unit); even so, I correct SWISCU's work and comment that the current practice should also be completed. Finally (4 hours later) it arrives, I comment and return work. Meanwhile I have also responded to approximately 18 other students emails--when 45 minutes ago this email arrives:

Statgirl,

In regards to your last comment, what details am I missing?

--SWISCU



SWISCU,

You did not include the original text in your email--I do not know to which comments you are refering. Please reply to the original email and include the text.

--Statgirl (who apparently has photographic memory of all 45- 60 emails which come in each day)

10 mintues later:

Statgirl,

I am just going to call you and explain my question since it is not clear.

--SWISCU


Wonder how long it will take genius SWISCU to realize I am not in my office at 10 pm ???? Any takers for how long the message on my voice mail is?? Bets on how many emails I will receive from SWISCU tomorrow??

Would it kill a student to THINK????

4 comments:

Astroprof said...

Sounds like my students!

I got one who called me a couple weeks ago and left a message saying that she was thinking of taking my class in the fall and asking if she could use the old edition of the textbook. She said that her name was XXX. Just the first name. That was it. No last name. No phone number. And, not even WHICH class she was signing up for. When I got to campus today, I found another message from her, wonderring why I had never called back.

Seeking Solace said...

Sadly, I honestly believe that it would kill students to think.

Anonymous said...

WHAT??? You mean you are not at your office 24/7? You mean you don't sleep on the office floor and eat all your meals from the snack machine downstairs just in case one of your students might need you? What kind of professor are you anyway? (Answer: One with a life!) Reminds me of when my middle school students would see me in the grocery store and gasp "What are YOU doing here?" I got really good at snarky answers like, "The school cafeteria is closed on Saturday, and I got hungry!" Had a blast with you visiting, just a preview of next year!
dice_singer

Abbey said...

Well, duh! If you are answering emails you're clearly in the office. I mean, that's the only place one can send and receive emails right? Computers only exist in on-campus offices. Sheesh.